A Christmas Letter by Martin Green


I see that the holiday season is upon us so it’s time for the Entwhistle family’s annual Christmas letter.

    I couldn’t feel less like doing this but our family and friends expect it, so here I go.

Stanley is busy with the consulting business he started this year, but he could always use more clients so if you know of anyone out there who needs a good marketing man don’t hesitate to let us know.

    Stanley still hasn’t found after those SOB’s at his old company laid him off. We’re hurting, people. Help.

I got tired of being home all the time so now have a job as a receptionist downtown. I like meeting new people and going to work with the other “girls.”

    And without my salary, meager as it is, we’d probably have gone under.

Our son Bertram graduated college and is living at home while he considers job prospects.

    He better find something soon as he’s driving us all crazy hanging around the house.

Melanie is a senior in high school and is on the cheerleading team. She’s very popular with the boys.

    She’d better be careful. That’s all we need, a pregnant daughter. And I don’t know what she’ll do after she graduates. We certainly can’t afford to send her to college.

We didn’t travel as much this year. I guess we’re among those people taking “staycations,” ha, ha. Stanley has done a lot of fixing up around the house.

    Travel? That’s a laugh. Who could afford it? And we couldn’t afford to hire anyone to do house repairs.

Well, here’s to a happy holiday season and to a great new year for all.

    It had better be a better new year or we’re definitely going under.


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