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Holiday hassles. By DA.

I'm (now) a celebrity get me out of here!This week a British holiday maker in the Greek resort of Faliraki was arrested for baring her breasts in a nightclub.
Jemma Gunning (there she is on the right) was later sentenced to 8 months in prison for "provoking public morals".

Now hang on a moment. This "provoking of public morals" was hardly going to upset the pillars of the local community, as it took place in the small hours of the night, in a nightclub, as part of their Eurovision Thong Contest
Unless, of course, the locals just went there for a nice quiet drink....?

The undercover (of dirty raincoats?) police who videotaped the event were just there as part of a team-building weekend I expect.
They'll be back on duty looking for plane-spotters next week.

I'm not trying to justify the lewd activities of "Brits on the piss" abroad. Indeed it must be depressing for the more sensitive residents of such Club 18-30 destinations to see yet another pair of British buttocks displayed late at night.

They are getting fed up, they want a better class of clientele.

What is to be done?

We must remember that travel companies and brewers make millions relieving British youngsters of a years worth of hard-earned pay in the space of two weeks.
A valuable social service is also being performed; whilst the little dears are soaking up the sun and alcohol abroad, they aren't making a nuisance of themselves here at home!
These holidays must continue...

I have a suggestion.
All these people want is sun, sea, sex and booze, they don't really care whether it's in Greece, Spain, Cyprus or wherever.
I think I shall set up the YobWorld resort. In a high-security compound somewhere nobody else wants to go and where nobody cares if you annoy the neighbours.

I'm putting in a bid for Guantanamo Bay when the Americans have finished with it. It'll be perfect!


P.S. Jemma's mum came and bailed her out of prison. Don't feel too sorry for her, a British tabloid paper has paid for her story. I expect to see more of Jemma (or at least as much as those Greek policemen did) soon...

© Winamop 2003

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© Winamop 2004