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Holiday hassles. By DA.
This week a British holiday maker in the Greek resort of Faliraki was arrested for baring her breasts in a nightclub.
Jemma Gunning (there she is on the right) was later sentenced to 8 months in prison for "provoking public morals".Now hang on a moment. This "provoking of public morals" was hardly going to upset the pillars of the local community, as it took place in the small hours of the night, in a nightclub, as part of their Eurovision Thong Contest
Unless, of course, the locals just went there for a nice quiet drink....?The undercover (of dirty raincoats?) police who videotaped the event were just there as part of a team-building weekend I expect.
They'll be back on duty looking for plane-spotters next week.I'm not trying to justify the lewd activities of "Brits on the piss" abroad. Indeed it must be depressing for the more sensitive residents of such Club 18-30 destinations to see yet another pair of British buttocks displayed late at night.
They are getting fed up, they want a better class of clientele.
What is to be done?
We must remember that travel companies and brewers make millions relieving British youngsters of a years worth of hard-earned pay in the space of two weeks.
A valuable social service is also being performed; whilst the little dears are soaking up the sun and alcohol abroad, they aren't making a nuisance of themselves here at home!
These holidays must continue...I have a suggestion.
All these people want is sun, sea, sex and booze, they don't really care whether it's in Greece, Spain, Cyprus or wherever.
I think I shall set up the YobWorld resort. In a high-security compound somewhere nobody else wants to go and where nobody cares if you annoy the neighbours.I'm putting in a bid for Guantanamo Bay when the Americans have finished with it. It'll be perfect!
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P.S. Jemma's mum came and bailed her out of prison. Don't feel too sorry for her, a British tabloid paper has paid for her story. I expect to see more of Jemma (or at least as much as those Greek policemen did) soon...
© Winamop 2003
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