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"Christmas Music is Rubbish" Shock.

'Tis the season to go shopping, and when you go shopping in November and December you will inevitably be subjected to a constant stream of saccharin twaddle from the in-store PA system.

A few years ago this may have been tolerable. It didn't start until December and it wasn't universal. Only the big department stores seemed to insist on "entertaining" their customers in this way.

Now it's different.
Every tin-pot newsagent has a Christmas CD on repeat from the middle of October until New year's day.
It's not just Bing Crosby and the terrible Phil Spector Christmas album these days either, I blame it on Slade. Since they guaranteed their old age pensions by hitting no.1 with "Merry Xmas Everybody" in 1973, the world has attempted to jump on their sleigh.
That tune charted again in 1980, 1981, 1982, 1983, 1984, 1985, 1986 and 1998, what a record...

Mud followed with "Lonely This Christmas" in 1974 and the die was cast.
The amount of absolute cobblers that has come out at Christmas has to be heard to be believed (but please don't play it to me whilst I'm shopping).

We've had schmaltz from such luminaries as George Harrison, Paul McCartney, Elton John, Greg Lake, Jon Bon Jovi and, of course, Whigfield. The Goodies and others took the mickey but the overwhelming flavour is one of cheese.
Sweet cheese.

The situation is so bad that a campaign has been started to reduce the amount of Christmas Muzac that we are subjected to whilst shopping. After all, if you are listening to the radio and a piss-poor Christmas record comes on, you can change the station; but if you're in a shop you are a captive audience, you have no option but to leave.

I suggest walking into various shops where Christmas Music is playing, stopping and cocking an ear, then saying in a loud clear voice: "This music is crap. I refuse to make any purchases in this establishment!"
You should then turn on your heel and march briskly out.
It's a lovely image isn't? A constant stream of people walking into supermarkets, cocking ears, declaiming and stalking out again!

Do it today, you know it makes sense.
If we don't do something soon it's going to happen all over again....


By the way, if you want to get into the spirit, have a listen to some of Uncle Dave's Christmas tunes.

© Winamop & DA 2003

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© Winamop 2004